To understand just how serious God is about relationships we need to know some history about Abraham and the Israelites. God made a promise to Abraham that through him a great nation would be born.
Genesis 12 New King James Version (NKJV)
Promises to Abram
12 Now the Lord had said to Abram: “Get out of your country, From your family And from your father’s house, To a land that I will show you. 2 I will make you a great nation; I will bless you And make your name great; And you shall be a blessing. 3 I will bless those who bless you, And I will curse him who curses you; And in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.”
God has never made a promise that he has not kept. There are promises that we are still waiting to happen but there will be a time when we will see those promises bear fruit. But that story is for another time. We are here to discuss just how important God considers relationships. Although it took over four hundred years for this promise to bear fruit it did happen. It took many events for this promise to happen. God not only had to deal through and with the nation of Egypt to bring this about but he also had to deal with a group of rebellious people. There is too much information on that to deal with here so I would suggest you read the bible for yourself to get the full picture of all that God has had to deal with. Chapter five of Proverbs gives us a picture of the actions of not only a harlot but of the harlotry of an entire nation.
It is a wonder that the nation of Israel was ever established. There were many times when God was at the point where he was about to destroy those that he had brought up out of the land of Egypt. But for the intersession of Moses that is what would have happened. It is easy to say that if we had lived back then we would never have rebelled against God. But human nature is at the root of the problem here. Since the Garden of Eden mankind has walked in a different direction than God. We have a tendency to look at things through a worldly view. And the farther we go down this road that we are taking the more worldly we become. God tells us that we are to love our neighbors as ourselves. But we are living in a world that is becoming more and more self-centered. The word of God gives us many examples of how God views relationships. First and foremost are the Ten Commandment. The world seems to be offended by these commandments but I will ask this question. Just how offended are you going to be when you are standing before the Throne of Judgement on judgement day? Think about how serious that question is. Your Name Is In the Book of Proverbs | Darwin Is Right
Exodus 20New King James Version (NKJV)
The Ten Commandments
20 And God spoke all these words, saying:
2 “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.
3 “You shall have no other gods before Me.
4 “You shall not make for yourself a carved image—any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth; 5 you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me, 6 but showing mercy to thousands, to those who love Me and keep My commandments.
7 “You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain.
8 “Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. 9 Six days you shall labor and do all your work, 10 but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God. In it you shall do no work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your male servant, nor your female servant, nor your cattle, nor your stranger who is within your gates. 11 For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.
12 “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
13 “You shall not murder.
14 “You shall not commit adultery.
15 “You shall not steal.
16 “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
17 “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.”
God gave us these commandments for two reasons. To show us how serious he is about sin. And to show us how serious he is about relationships.
Exodus 20:5New King James Version (NKJV)
5 you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me,
Below are some examples of how God feels about relationships with him and others. You will notice that second in the tree of relationships is the marriage relationship. This is because this relationships is the bond that God established. The world is busy trying to destroy that relationship. This bond is something that God holds very dear to his heart. People have treated this relationship like they by television set today. Every so many years it is time to throw the old one out and get a new one. This is not how Got looks at this relationship. And those who pervert it in any way will answer to God for it. As you read on and get to the Proverbs 5 lesson below let God minister to your heart. Because if you are not honest with yourself then you are telling God that you are refusing to listen to him. That is your choice for now. And it will be up and to the point that you take your last breath. At that point you would have made your choice and you will not like it.
You and God
Matthew 22:37-40 (NKJV)
37 Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and great commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.”
Husband and Wife Relationships
Genesis 2:18-25 (NKJV)
18 And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” 19 Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.
21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.23 And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Proverbs 31:10-11 (NKJV)
10 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. 11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain.
Matthew 19:5 (NKJV)
5 and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?
1 Corinthians 7 (NKJV)
…Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control … Read entire text. (NKJV)
Ephesians 5:23-33New King James Version (NKJV)
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her … In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself … and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Read entire text. (ESV)
1 Peter 3:7 (NKJV)
7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
Exodus 20:12 (NKJV)
12 “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
Leviticus 19:3 (NKJV)
3 ‘Every one of you shall revere his mother and his father, and keep My Sabbaths: I am the Lord your God.
Deuteronomy 5:16 (NKJV)
16 ‘Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
Psalm 127:3 (NKJV)
3 Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Proverbs 31:28-31 (NKJV)
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all.” 30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. 31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.
John 19:26-27 (NKJV)
26 When Jesus therefore saw His mother, and the disciple whom He loved standing by, He said to His mother, “Woman, behold your son!” 27 Then He said to the disciple, “Behold your mother!” And from that hour that disciple took her to his own home.
Ephesians 6:1-3 (NKJV)
6 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: 3 “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
Proverbs 17:17 (NKJV)
17 A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.
Proverbs 18:24 (NKJV)
24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Proverbs 27:6 (NKJV)
6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
Proverbs 27:9-10 (NKJV)
9 Ointment and perfume delight the heart, And the sweetness of a man’s friend gives delight by hearty counsel. 10 Do not forsake your own friend or your father’s friend, Nor go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity; Better is a neighbor nearby than a brother far away.
General Relationships and Brothers and Sisters in Christ
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NKJV)
9 Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor. 10 For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up. 11 Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm; But how can one be warm alone? 12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
Matthew 5:38-42 (NKJV)
38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’[a] 39 But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. 40 If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. 41 And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two. 42 Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away.
Matthew 6:14-15 (NKJV)
14 “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
Matthew 18:15-17 (NKJV)
15 “Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.” 17 And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.
1 Corinthians 6:1-7New King James Version (NKJV)
6 Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unrighteous, and not before the saints? 2 Do you not know that the saints will judge the world? And if the world will be judged by you, are you unworthy to judge the smallest matters? 3 Do you not know that we shall judge angels? How much more, things that pertain to this life? 4 If then you have judgments concerning things pertaining to this life, do you appoint those who are least esteemed by the church to judge? 5 I say this to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you, not even one, who will be able to judge between his brethren? 6 But brother goes to law against brother, and that before unbelievers!
7 Now therefore, it is already an utter failure for you that you go to law against one another. Why do you not rather accept wrong? Why do you not rather let yourselves be cheated?
Galatians 5:13 (NKJV)
13 For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.
1 Timothy 5:1-3 (NKJV)
5 Do not rebuke an older man, but exhort him as a father, younger men as brothers, 2 older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, with all purity. 3 Honor widows who are really widows.
Hebrews 10:24 (NKJV)
24 And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works,
1 John 3:1 (NKJV)
3 Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God! Therefore the world does not know us, because it did not know Him.
Proverbs 4:23 (NKJV)
23 Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life.
Song of Solomon 4:9 (NKJV)
9 You have ravished my heart, My sister, my spouse; You have ravished my heart With one look of your eyes, With one link of your necklace.
Romans 12:1-2 (NKJV)
12 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. 2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
1 Corinthians 6:18 (NKJV)
18 Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.
1 Corinthians 15:33 (NKJV)
33 Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”
2 Corinthians 6:14-15 (NKJV)
14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?
1 Timothy 5:1-2 (NKJV)
5 Do not rebuke an older man, but exhort him as a father, younger men as brothers, 2 older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, with all purity.
Proverbs 5:1 “My son, attend unto my wisdom, [and] bow thine ear to my understanding:” Proverbs 5:2 “That thou mayest regard discretion, and [that] thy lips may keep knowledge.”
We see here, again, instructions to stay wise to the things of God. The wise father marshals all the essential terms to sum up his call to wisdom.
We will see in this chapter the path we should take. Marriage will be spoken of as honorable and adultery of all kinds will be condemned.
Proverbs 5:3 “For the lips of a strange woman drop [as] an honeycomb, and her mouth [is] smoother than oil:”
“Lips – Mouth”: Seduction begins with deceptive flattery. Lips of honey should be part of true love in marriage.
Proverbs 5:4 “But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword.” Proverbs 5:5 “Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.”
Possibly a word we might understand a little better than “strange” woman would be a loose, sinful woman. This woman is forbidden fruit making her more mysterious and inviting to the young man. Prostitutes are out to allure the young men and sometimes the older, as well. They are dressed with very few clothes so as to reveal their bodies. Their lips are painted and they are trained to allure the weak men of the world. A woman like this has no future. Bitterness, sickness, early death, and then hell is what she has to look forward to. The two edged sword is the Bible she should have heeded.
The future of tasting her lips is like “wormwood”, a symbol of suffering, and a “sword,” the symbol of death and hell. “Wormwood” means bad water.
Proverbs 5:6 “Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, [that] thou canst not know [them].”
This woman is unstable in all her ways. Don’t get involved with her; she will not be faithful to you. In most cities, her profession is against the law.
Her steps willfully and predictably stagger here and there as she has no concern for the abyss ahead.
Verses 7-14 describe the high price of infidelity. The focus here is on the guilty suffering of the one who yields to lust rather than obeying God’s law. Contrast the proper response to such temptation in the case of Joseph.
Proverbs 5:7 “Hear me now therefore, O ye children, and depart not from the words of my mouth.”
Here, again, the penman is saying take special heed to this, ye young men.
Proverbs 5:8 “Remove thy way far from her, and come not nigh the door of her house:”
Stay away from evil women like this. Don’t even go near her house. She will bring nothing but disappointment. Stay honorable. If you were to get involved with her, you would lead an unhappy life.
Proverbs 5:9-10 “Lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto the cruel:” “Lest strangers be filled with thy wealth; and thy labours [be] in the house of a stranger;”
There is no lasting happiness to be found with this type of woman. This is speaking of spending hard earned money on a prostitute and then getting some terrible disease in the process. In our time, people are dying everywhere from diseases caused by adultery. In many cases, there is no cure.
Proverbs 5:11 “And thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh and thy body are consumed,”
This could be a reference to venereal disease, or to the natural end of life. At that point, filled with an irreversible regret, the ruined sinner vainly laments his neglect of warning and his sad disgrace.
Proverbs 5:12 “And say, How have I hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof;” Proverbs 5:13 “And have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined mine ear to them that instructed me!”
Now that it is too late to turn back, we see regret that he did not take heed to the warning given. We see regret by this man that he rebelled against instruction. He did not let his teacher instruct him, so he had the cruel teacher of experience. He now knows that he made a terrible mistake not listening.
Proverbs 5:14 “I was almost in all evil in the midst of the congregation and assembly.”
A most painful loss in such a situation is public disgrace in the community. There can be public confession, discipline, and forgiveness, but not restoration to one’s former place of honor and service. (See 6:33)
Even though training and instruction in righteousness had been offered this individual, he had rejected it. One sin leads to another, and we see this person falling into more and worse sins until their last state is one of total inability to stop sinning. He had no conscience.
Proverbs 5:15 “Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well.”
Using the imagery of water, the joy of a faithful marriage is contrasted with the disaster of infidelity. “Cistern and well” refer to the wife from whom the husband is to draw all his satisfying refreshment, sexually and affectionately.
Proverbs 5:16 “Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, [and] rivers of waters in the streets.” Proverbs 5:17 “Let them be only thine own, and not strangers’ with thee.”
“Fountains … streams”: The euphemism refers to the male procreation capacity with the idea of the foolish as a fountain scattering precious water, a picture of the wastefulness of sexual promiscuity.
The result of such indiscriminate sin is called “streams of waters in the street,” a graphic description of the illegitimate street children of harlotry. Rather, says Solomon, “let them be only your own” and not the children of such immoral strangers.
In short, stay at home and enjoy the things that God has provided for you and your family. Don’t go looking for greener grass.
Proverbs 5:18 “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.”
These fountains of living waters in verses l6, 17, and 18 are speaking of families which are produced by married couples who are happy with each other, always.
“Fountain …. Blessed”. God offers to bless male procreation when it is confined to one’s wife. It should be noted that, in spite of the sinful polygamy of David and Solomon, as well as the disastrous polygamy of Rehoboam, the instruction here identifies God’s ideal as one wife from youth on.
Verse 18 says take another look at the wife of your youth. You loved her then, love her now. The two of you are one flesh.
Proverbs 5:19 “[Let her be as] the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.”
The hind, (doe) has graceful beauty in her face and form and is often used in the poetry of bible times for the beauty of a woman. Breasts are an imagery of affection. This can be seen in The Song of Solomon.
There has been a terrible cancer of sin in our society the last few years. That is people who are living together without the benefit of marriage. This is not only sin, but sin that involves the temple of the Holy Ghost of God. We are the temple of the Holy Ghost. Some way God will stop this. This is not His plan for man and woman. God made one man for one woman, and they two become one flesh; not for a few days but for a lifetime together on this earth.
The family on earth is a type and shadow of the eternal family in heaven. Jesus is the groom, and all believers are the bride of Christ. In heaven, there is a heavenly Father. For marriage to work here on the earth there has to be a heavenly Father who we center our marriage around. God can give you a special love for your wife or husband, even if you have been married over 50 years.
Teach us to love our mate, Dear Lord. Show us the difference in love and lust. Love is of the spirit, but lust is of the flesh. Our prayer should be, “Lord, build our marriage on the solid Rock that cannot crumble when the storms of life come.”
Proverbs 5:20 “And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger?”
The answer to that is lust of the flesh. Such behavior is presented as having no benefit; thus, to justify such folly is senseless.
Proverbs 5:21 “For the ways of man [are] before the eyes of the LORD, and he pondereth all his goings.”
You cannot hide from God. He knows every move you make. He even knows the desires of your heart. God thinks about (ponders) all the ways of man. In mercy the Lord withholds immediate judgment, allowing a sinner time to repent or to be caught in his own sin.
There is a song called “The All Seeing Eye”. God is that all Seeing Eye. You cannot keep any secrets from Him. There is a record being kept, and someday the books will be opened. If we have lived in sin, we shall be ashamed to stand before God.
Proverbs 5:22 “His own iniquities shall take the wicked himself, and he shall be holden with the cords of his sins.”
We see, here, that sin gets worse as time goes on. A person caught up in this type of life will tie their own selves up in this sin. Adultery seems to be especially bad to the Lord. This sin of adultery, which also includes homosexual and lesbian acts, carries its own special punishment with it. Verse 23 tells the awful end of this type of person.
Proverbs 5:23 “He shall die without instruction; and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.”
Unless this type of sin is repented of and turned away from totally, the end of this person is such it would have been better had they never lived. Destruction lies ahead.
Proverbs Chapter 5 Questions
- What is condemned in this lesson?
- The lips of a _________ __________drop as honeycomb.
- The bitter end of this woman is compared to what?
- What does it mean?
- Where is her destination?
- What makes this woman inviting to the young men?
- What tells us this woman is unstable?
- Why is it so important to move thyself away from her door?
- What will happen to your wealth if you follow this type of woman?
- In verse 12, he is feeling what about his life?
- In this case, what is the cruel teacher?
- What does verse 14 mean about being in all evil?
- What does the fact that he was in the congregation tell us?
- Drink waters where?
- Who is the man to rejoice with?
- Whose love should he be ravished with?
- What is one cancer of sin in our society today?
- When we are involved in body sin, who do we include in our sin?
- Love is of the _________.
- Lust is of the _________.
- Who knows every sin we commit, even if we feel we are hidden?
- If we have sinned and not repented, what shall we feel when we stand before God?
- What terrible end comes to this sinner in verse 23?
Proverbs 5New King James Version (NKJV)
The Peril of Adultery
5 My son, pay attention to my wisdom;
Lend your ear to my understanding,
2 That you may preserve discretion,
And your lips may keep knowledge.
3 For the lips of an immoral woman drip honey,
And her mouth is smoother than oil;
4 But in the end she is bitter as wormwood,
Sharp as a two-edged sword.
5 Her feet go down to death,
Her steps lay hold of hell.
6 Lest you ponder her path of life—
Her ways are unstable;
You do not know them.
7 Therefore hear me now, my children,
And do not depart from the words of my mouth.
8 Remove your way far from her,
And do not go near the door of her house,
9 Lest you give your honor to others,
And your years to the cruel one;
10 Lest aliens be filled with your wealth,
And your labors go to the house of a foreigner;
11 And you mourn at last,
When your flesh and your body are consumed,
12 And say:
“How I have hated instruction,
And my heart despised correction!
13 I have not obeyed the voice of my teachers,
Nor inclined my ear to those who instructed me!
14 I was on the verge of total ruin,
In the midst of the assembly and congregation.”
15 Drink water from your own cistern,
And running water from your own well.
16 Should your fountains be dispersed abroad,
Streams of water in the streets?
17 Let them be only your own,
And not for strangers with you.
18 Let your fountain be blessed,
And rejoice with the wife of your youth.
19 As a loving deer and a graceful doe,
Let her breasts satisfy you at all times;
And always be enraptured with her love.
20 For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman,
And be embraced in the arms of a seductress?
21 For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord,
And He ponders all his paths.
22 His own iniquities entrap the wicked man,
And he is caught in the cords of his sin.
23 He shall die for lack of instruction,
And in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.